My women’s Bible study group once read a book called He Speaks in the Silence, about a woman’s journey of going deaf at the age of 26. She shares about her utter disappointment in God’s lack of protection over her and struggles to trust in His good plan for her life.
The Christian life does not always fit neatly into a box. Sometimes we are thrown circumstances that are hard, perplexing even and no matter much we try to put on a smile and play the unwavering faith card, disappointment can often linger just beneath the surface of our fragile souls.
Can you relate?
For example, we may we feel our lives are not turning out as we had hoped. Or unexpected hardships come up that are keeping us from really pursuing what God has for us. Or God promised us something long ago – a life partner, a child or a career advancement – that has yet to come to pass. We wonder: Where are you God? Don’t you see me? I’ve trusted You, so why haven’t you upheld Your end of the bargain?
Disappointment is defined in the dictionary as:
“…sadness or displeasure caused by the non-fulfillment of one’s hopes and expectations.“
It is not something we want to feel or we try to feel but when it shows up, it seems nearly impossible to shake. It can even hang like a dark cloud over our hearts, hardening our view of God and all of reality.
So how can we dispel the disheartening effects of disappointment? I want to offer three practical tips, which we can apply to our lives to help sustain us through seasons of disappointment:
- Pouring out our hearts. Time and time again we see in the Psalms the value of raw honesty before God: “Pour out your hearts to Him for God is our refuge” says the writer of Psalm 62. Hannah is another example, being a woman who was deeply disappointed in her inability to have children. After years of waiting, she describes how all she could do was pour out her soul to the Lord, “I have been praying here out of my deep anguish and grief.” I don’t think it gets much more honest than that. Pouring our hearts out to God in raw honesty may not lead to immediate relief of our circumstances, but it often can bring relief to our emotions, reconnecting us to God.
- Praying with others. The enemy wants us to remain in isolation but we need others to hope and pray for and with us, especially when we are not able to ourselves. James 5 instructs us to “…confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” Sharing our lives and being vulnerable can be scary but this is often the key to encouragement when we are drowning in disappointment. Are you allowing yourself to experience the uplifting, healing and restoring power of God through prayers from others?
- Preaching to our souls. In Psalm 42 the writer says, “Why, my soul are you downcast, why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my savior and my God.” Disappointment is acknowledged in this passage but the writer does not allow himself to wallow in that place. He instead preaches to himself to hope in God. We can do this too. New hope will rise in our hearts as we remind ourselves that God is in charge, even if it doesn’t look like it.
Pour. Pray. Preach. These are things we can do over and over no matter what comes our way to dispel the crippling effects that disappointment can often bring. Try it. And as you do, may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit (Romans 15:13).